I'd Like To Strangle Red Tape Till It Turns Blue

I'm in some stupid rinky dink internet cafe at the UP shopping center, trying to keep calm and view matters with a healthy dose of humor.

I'm failing miserably.

I went here to get the transcript of my Tito in the States. I went to the Registrar's office to apply for one. No problem there. Found out I had to pay less than I expected. Certainly no problem there. Found out I had to pay all the way at PNB - a skip, a hop, a leap, a somersault, a pirouette, and a plié away. It was already 11:18 am. I knew they'd close at 12 for lunch.

Problem most definitely there.

So I get to PNB at around 11:43 (yep, I actually checked.) Whoa-ho, well waddayaknow. Those beautiful government employees were already on lunch. So now I'm stuck here till 1, to pay a measly fee.

I managed to find this place, which was a relief I thought - until I went in. It reminded me of the sweatshops in Cambodia. And the connection is S - L - O - W. So slow that...wait, is that the tortoise zipping by to cross the finish line? By golly, it is...and I'm still not done downloading!!!

Did I mention after paying for the fee I had to go back to the Registrar just to show that I've actually paid - and THEN they can go work on the application?

I swear to all things holy and powerful in all known and unknown religions in the world!!!

I mean, sure, this is UP's schtick. Only the brave and the ridiculously patient can survive here. But seriously, there is some measure of insanity here. THIS is our State University. Oi!!!

And for the record: It's not that I'm impatient. It's just that THEY'RE slow.

Harumph. So there.

The Day After

It's the day after my birthday and now I guess I'm allowed to be depressed.

I'm leaving, I'm leaving, I'm leaving and it sucks, sucks, sucks.

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

I actually disinfected my floors 3 times today. Yup, the panic is that bad. At least I'm productive when I panic.

Now I'm running out of things to clean. Damn.

Of pink balloons and cut-out letters

I opened my door to a room filled with pink balloons and cut-out letters spelling "Happy Birthday."

Can I just make yabang? I have the bestest, mostest, gushiest boyfriend in the world!

This is going to be a good day.

Last Hurrah

So today's my last day to be 25. Technically, I was round-off-able since last year, but when I turn 26, there's no denying it anymore. I'm totally round-off-able to 30 now.

Ugh.

And I'm having serious separation anxiety. Every time I hug my boyfriend now I feel like I'm on the verge of crying. And as it turns out, I might now start school on January pala! Hayyy. All these stupid visa requirements. Blech.

Plus, celebrating my birthday means my departure is now more imminent than ever.

I don't want to go. I don't want to break status quo. This sucks.

The Night I Got Mad At Oprah

So I was watching yet another episode of Oprah and instead of being reduced to tears because of touching moments, I am mad.

Her special report was on the deteriorating state of US Education. As should be, she underscored the gravity of the number of high school drop outs, etcetera. Having been a teacher for 3 years and having decided on continuing to do so till I am able, I totally get it. I. Get. It.

What I am livid about are the following:

Oprah said that based on some study or another, the US now places 24th in terms of Math aptitude. Shocking. What she said after, however, disturbed me (and it still does). She said that "poorer" nations are now doing better. It's not so much that she was stating details that could have easily been supported by facts. It was her whole attitude about it. As if those "poorer" nations had no right to be better than the US.

She then said that the position that America has a as a world leader is now being threatened by the fact that its children are basically getting dumber (my paraphrasing, not her words).

So!?!?!?!

What about nations that do not have the ability to place in any positive global standard because of the debt they have with these alleged power nations? What about the million of children ELSEWHERE, in the rest of the world (read: MAJORITY of the WORLD) who are not given the right to free quality education?

So what if these "poorer" nations are doing better? Instead of talking about how badly that puts America in WHATEVER list it leads in, how about giving due kudos to these nations who have recognized that the greatest weapon they have against the tyranny of poverty is education?

Listen up. The problem, America, is that you have grown too complacent and arrogant. You are raising children used to comfort, who feel as if they don't need to work to have luxury. While this is what is ideal, you are, in a nutshell, raising a nation of spoiled brats.

Us "poor nations" know we have to work hard. Sure, there are all sorts of things that continue to bog us down: corruption and greed and hatred and envy. But we work. And you know what the good thing about being used to being at the bottom is? When somebody overtakes us, we can congratulate them and know we just need to keep working to be better. Not begrudge others of hard-earned success.

Shame, shame, shame on you.

And yes, I do realize the irony of the fact that I will be going there in about a month to study EDUCATION there. Yeah. See how this poor Filipino will break all your learning curves. See how this poor Filipino will show you all what learning is for.

You go focus on your problem, because that is valid. But don't go harping on it just because it makes you look bad. It makes you look bad because others are beginning to look better.

WHAT KIND OF STANDARD IS THAT?

Greatness is not relative. You either are or you aren't.

Adult Party

No, folks. Not that kind of adult party. I mean complete courses with a rockin' bottle of wine, good company, good conversation.

It felt kinda weird being at that stage that I actually hosted such a thing (and that it was such a successful potluck!!!) but it felt good and comfy and fuzzy inside.

I was (as always) updating my diary cum planner cum ranting outlet (you think this is the extent of my ranting? HAH!) and saw that I have but a little over a month till I leave. I'm getting into serious mini-panic attacks as to how I'm supposed to ship all my stuff (read: shoes and books - I'm ditzy and nerdy that way...) and all the other "stuff" I'm supposed to do. I mean, I start school again on January. I'll be a full time student. How odd.

Deep slow breaths.

I digress though. That adult dinner party was really nice because it made me realize who my real friends are (not just because of those who were present but also mostly because of the conversations) and I feel really sad about leaving all of them behind. This sucks.

So what's my point? Growing up sucks. But the wine's good.

Labo.

"Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty! Free at last!"

Last Saturday wasn't so difficult after all. I thought it would be awkward or I'd be consumed with tempered rage—but it was only awkward for about as long as it takes to hiccup and I was not angry at all.

I had to keep checking myself and it's confirmed. I'm not angry at him anymore. Maybe a little sad for him (and really, I don't know why exactly) but I'm not angry at him anymore. And it feels so liberating! I mean, I had a sneaking suspicion that I wasn't angry anymore—but given my propensity for rage, I didn't want to assume so quickly. Being there in the same place as he for a prolonged period of time was kinda cool for me, because I knew that it really didn't bother me anymore.

Of course, it didn't hurt that my wonderful boyfriend was right beside me the whole time.

But it feels great to not be angry anymore.

From Over The Fence

Er, is this thing on...?

Hello. I decided to create a new blog because the last one I had kept updating the world every time I wrote something new and there was something weird about that as far as I was concerned. I say, if you must voyeur, do so as a choice and not because you were invited to. Does that make sense to anybody else?

Also...well, I was in a bad funk the last few days (weeks?) and I wanted to get rid of the bad joojoo.

So let's hope this thing finally works for me. :)